Posted by: nastypen | June 22, 2008

The Absence of Balance

I slept at my brother-in-law’s house in Lagro. I haven’t seen his nephew Miggy for months. When I see him, I would usually draw for him. He asked me to draw Po, the Kung-Fu Panda. As I was scribbling on a piece of paper, the eight and half year old boy asked me with earnest eyes, “Are you like the Panda? Do you have a hard time finding your balance?” And yet another person telling me that character reminds them of me….

I know Miggy asked that if because I am so fat and so panda-esque.  But I took that question and exponentially enlarged it with the cosmos as my backdrop.  Am I really balanced?  Am I solid and unflinching?  Will I ever be able to say “It’s ok.  I’m happy.  It doesn’t matter” and that kind of quest for balance?  The philosophical implication snowballed.  I became hungry and ate pizza.  Very Panda-esque reaction to the heady questions of life.


There was some drama at the Makati residence. I lacked sleep from the drama that involved a frazzled house mate and ghosts. When I reached Lagro, I stress-ate several slices of pizza and slept for hours. Miggy wanted to draw but saw me flopped down on the bed snoring. He asked my sister if I’m going to be asleep the whole day.


When I woke up, the wind was getting a bit stronger. I just thought of my meeting the other day with classmate and current College of Fine arts instructor for Photography Marc. He infused a rush of blood over the art of photography. OOOhhh the possibilities!! The possibilities!!! Just what I need to fall in love with that art form once again. I won’t say anything first but I did manage to do some shots of drawing with lights. It was fun.


Today, I was the last one to wake up. It must be because I woke up at 4am to the howling winds. and I was freaked out in a strange room with no electricity.


Miggy asked for me during breakfast. My sister said I was still asleep. Miggy yelled “Tito Chong is still sleeping again?! Is he always the last one to wake up?” Then he paused and remembered Kung-Fu Panda. And he nodded, “It must be because he eats too much.”


Kids say the darnest things. This is why I am afraid of them. Hahahahahaa. I hope Miggy wasn’t expecting that I do splits over some cookies.


As for Miggy’s question “Do you have a hard time finding your balance?”  I don’t know.  But I like what I’m doing right now.  Does that count?  In my book, it does….exponentially.


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