Posted by: nastypen | January 7, 2008

It’s the Centennial, Bring Out Kokak

So, I got a message the other night asking me to show up in University of the Philippines Diliman on early Monday morning for a segment of a local TV station’s morning show. No way on earth will I wake up earlier than usual for a TV show. I joked, “Maybe they will feature the centennial of U.P. in that horrendous dance segment of theirs.”

I was right.

My sister called out for me early morning as I readied for class. She was smiling because the UP Carillon (Bell tower) will finally play after a long time of silence brought about by disrepair. So, there is a sense of pride for that until they zoomed in on their special guests.

First, Kokak is still alive? Rachel Lobangco is forever Kokak in my mind. Imagine our surprise when her face beamed in our TV sets. I couldn’t understand what she was rambling about. All I thought was that she has a great body and she should do a remake of the Filipino film classic Kokak wherein her character is an enchanted frog who turns into a woman. My sister and I were pointing at questionable spots on her face and body where she may have had work done.

Then it dawned on me that they are still doing the segment about the UP Centennial!

Then another starlet appears on the screen. I forget her name but she has these big eyes and irritating face trying to be cute that makes me want to bitchslap her. Then it got worse.

I knew it! My fears were true! They did the dance segment in UP. For those who are not familiar, morning shows here in the Philippines follow the format of American morning shows, except they have these dance segments.

There was a stage there flanked by an audience. When the camera panned closer, my sister commented that they looked like professors. Most of them were. And they had this smile that is a mixture of pained, contrived and frustrated because they were subjected to witness this atrocity.

Atrocity? Well, the TV monitor showed this woman in fringed underwear with her back turned towards us. When she turned, I thought it was Madame Auring! Perhaps it was because I was not wearing my glasses that I really thought she was this:

SE-XAY!!!!!

It was like staring at a traffic pile-up of cars, you can’t avert your eyes from disaster.My sister screamed, “Oh My God! It’s Pia Moran!” Pia Moran?!? I haven’t heard that name this millennium! Pia Moran was hot for three seconds back in the dark ages of good taste the 80s! What is she doing!? She’s dancing?!

My classmate who teaches at UP Diliman was griping about this. He was made to go to work early only to see this.

Some of his statements from the chat:

pre, hiningal pag katapos ng segment (Buddy, she was gasping after her dance)
lola okay ka lang ba? (Grandma, are you ok?)
napa unang hirit pa nga kami kanina, puta ang aga aga all smiles kami (We went because of that morning show. Fuck. It was too early and we were all smiles.)
buti na lang umalis na ako kaagad, baka magpakamatay lang ako (Good thing I left early, or else I would have committed suicide)

Goodness. Why did UP allow this? It’s celebrating one hundred years for crying out loud. Not a vehicle for a comeback of a “star” whose twinkle has long since died out in the Aquino administration. Hey, I have no problem of older women flaunting their …errr… sensuality, but at the TV segment of the centennial of my beloved alma mater? The very alma mater who produced many people of significance (for better or ill) in the Philippines in its relatively short yet substantial history? OH HELL NO!

After all, what says “excellence” more than Kokak and a woman of a certain age in fringed undies? Cue in U.P. Naming Mahal please…..

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Responses

  1. wow… that was one big croak for the up centennial


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