Posted by: nastypen | August 10, 2007

UP Naming Mahal

I am so glad. 2007-2008 is the centennial of the University of the Philippines system. I am honored to have been hired as an instructor at such a time when there will be celebrations over past achievements and even self-criticisms over the University’s failures and foibles (Does YOUR university do this?).

There will be the usual drone of speeches and commemorations from the big wigs of the system. Former students that made it big will give inspirational talks to the beleaguered professors and current crop of students.

Several aspirations are invoked to the improvement of the vast UP system that helped churn out leaders, revolutionaries and luminaries as well as notorious figures in Philippine history.

And then there is this…..

Answering the UP Questionnaire:

U.P. AKO. IKAW?

1. ANO’NG STUDENT NUMBER MO?
– 95-52824

2. ANO ANG FIRST CHOICE MO NA COURSE?
– Bachelor of Fine Arts (I took that exam in high school determining which course you should take. I scored high in Law and History. Next was Mechanical Engineering (?!). Third was Literature. Fourth and lastly, was Art. Ergo, I took the weakest link because I see it as a challenge. My grade school guidance counselor talked to my mother to convince me not to take up Art in “that Godless University.” I became more adamant because of that.)

3. SECOND CHOICE?
– History (I always thought my history classes in grade school and high school were inadequate and riddled with rote take on dates and not really understanding history, so what better location to study history but at THE State University?)

4. ANO COURSE MO NA NATAPOS?
– Bachelor of Fine Arts in Visual Communication (I wanted to have a minor in either comparative literature or creative writing but Fine Arts disallowed me!)

5. NAG-SHIFT KA BA?
– Almost but never did. It was a moment of weakness. I wanted to shift to Ateneo because their ROTC is so easy compared to UP Diliman. I’m glad I didn’t.

6. CHINITO/CHINITA KA BA?
– They say I am a sumo wrestler. Does that count?

7. NAKAPAG-DORM KA BA?
– Yes! For the love of God and Everything Holy, YES!!!! The greatest trial in my young life….but I met my greatest love there….so, I am blessed with great character-building memories.

8. NAKA 4 KA BA?
– Nope.

9. NAG-KA 3 KA NA BA?
– Nope.

10. LAGI KA BANG PUMAPASOK SA KLASE?

– Well, if I had a brilliant professor, I hardly cut classes.

11. MAY SCHOLARSHIP KA BA??
– CAP before its meltdown.

12. ILANG UNITS NA ANG NAIPASA MO?
– Everything, baby. I got ok grades. I did not really exert myself that much. Once, I remembered that I had an exam about 12 minutes before the start of the exam. And it was freaking Natural Science II…Geology. Urgh. I passed. Thank you, God!

13. NANGARAP KA BA NA MAG-CUM LAUDE?
– Well………honestly, no.

14. FAVE PROF

– Professor Gealogo (Kasaysayan I, my first semester in UP and I got him as a prof and I wanted to learn MORE MORE MORE about our history and culture), Prof Brenda Fajardo (MA subject for Philippine Painting), Prof Ruben Canete (MA subject for Readings in Art History) Prof Castaneda (because he is the toughest Fine Arts Professor and if he gives his compliment, that means you are brilliant.) Prof Tats Enrique (because he is both dismissive and encouraging.) Prof Fortin (Film Professor, because he pointed at me in front of everyone and bellowed, “You! You don’t listen to my instructions. You do your own thing!…..I LIKE that.”)

15. WORST TEACHER
– No need to mention anyone. I told him of his “failure” as a professor after graduation. He smiled sheepishly. I am at peace with him.

16. FAVE SUBJECT/S:
– Humanities I (because most of my classmates hated reading, ergo I shone in that class), Philosophy I (fell in love with the professor…ahhh youthful misguidance), Kasaysayan I (I fell in love with history even more), Film Production (because this is where I became despotic and because the group I am in managed to sneak our little film in the 13th Alternative Film Festival in CCP), Editorial Design (My LOWEST grade to date….made me want to be an Editorial cartoonist even more), Photography (because the dark room is the most profoundly peaceful room in UP CFA, phantasms notwithstanding)

17. WORST SUBJECT:
– ROTC!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hated it! Waste of time, sweat and money!

18. FAVE BUILDING:
– Main Library and UP College of Fine Arts

19. PABORITONG KAINAN:
– There was this one stall in Shopping Center that I would go to for their cheesburgers. Now, it’s a xerox place. So, I guess it would have to be Chocolate Kiss… oooh and Manong Nestor’s fishball kiosk. God, I spent a fortune on squid balls.

20. MAGKANO BA ANG BINABAYAD MO SA JEEP?
– 1.25 Oh Jesus…… Imagine my shock when I ride the Ikot Jeep these days.

21. LAGI KA BA SA LIBRARY?
– Fine Arts Library to read the newspapers (Love the blind items in Manila Times when the Gokongweis owned that newspaper) and at the Humanities library at the Main Library (because sometimes books are better companions than people)

22. NAGPUPUNTA KA BA SA CLINIC?
– Last time I was there was 1996….when the doctor told me I had chicken pox.

23. MAY CRUSH KA BA SA CAMPUS?
– Do you want a list? It’s quite a short one. Ahahahaha! I had more crushes at Ateneo.

24. ANU-ANO ANG MGA NAGING P.E. MO?
– Wushu (yes…Wu f*cking shu! I have shamed that noble form of martial arts.) Table Tennis (was the second worst player in the class. the worst was a girl named Warlinda. I will forever love her because I was better than her and because she has a fierce name) PE I (DROPPED! I got the Dean of the College of Human Kinetics as the teacher and she expected optimum performance. She was lucky I showed up in the first four classes before she made us run THREE laps in the massive UP oval track and then I decided it isn’t worth it. ) Weight Training (DROPPED! I was desperate for a PE. I thought I would love weight training with UP’s ancient weights…rumor has it, some of them were Alexander the Great’s. I’d rather masturbate girls). Social Dance (I loved this PE because I didn’t realize I can foxtrot. I’d forgotten the lessons after one semester though) and STREET DANCE (I was the OLDEST in class. Because I postponed my PE till my final year, my classmates were my little sister’s dorm mates. Had to grind to TLC and Brandy, bitch! Fat people can dance. Enjoyed this one, too. But the most memorable thing that happened here is that I heard a rumor that the PE teacher for street Dance and I became lovers! I realize my reputation is having more fun than me!)

25. KAMUSTA NAMAN ANG BLOCK NYO?
– Alive. A couple are married. Three became faggots. Some graduated. Some became OFWs. Some are Art Directors. One became a teacher. No lesbians, though. Some galvanized their love for comics. One is a head hunter for a call center. Some had acclimatized to American accents and earn more. No suicides…yet.

26. MEMORIZE MO BA ANG HYMN NIYO?
– Nope.

27. MEMBER KA BA NG VARSITY TEAM?
– I’m very lucky I can walk.

28. NAKA-PERFECT KA NA BA NG EXAM?

– Yes. Just to spite the Math professor because he accused me of cheating because I was JUST from Fine Arts. After that accusation, I handed him the quizzes way before everyone else. On the final exam, I didn’t answer the last three questions and told him before I handed him the paper “I don’t need a perfect score” and walked out. I did wave good-bye to the bastard. Never underestimate a bitch!

29. DITO KA BA NATUTONG UMINOM NG BEER?
– No. My first alcoholic experience was when I was four years old.

30. DITO KA BA UNANG NA-IN LOVE?
– Yes and it’s still an ongoing saga.

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Responses

  1. Hehehe. I know that WORST teacher… and my goodness… mas kinarir mong pagsagot sa questionaire na ito!!!

    WINNER!!!

  2. Dafat!!! ibig sabihin nun im f*cking bored. Or I’m so busy that I want to do something else instead.


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