Posted by: nastypen | May 16, 2007

Viva Las Divas

I met up with friends in Cebu. This is one of the best parts going home. Seeing them and talking make the Cebu summer heat bearable. It is so hot here, that I had my pants washed late morning, only to have them dried and ironed before the sun set. Anyway, I will paraphrase what cartoonist Marjane Satrapi wrote about conversations bringing “ventilation to the heart.”


I met up with Addie’s sister Karen’s friends (whew, the connection!): Yova the Diva, Gil and Eva (Ebglen) with Biba (Addie’s best friend from high school). We made the hours that night slip by fast with good old gossip. Yova and the gang are planning to go to Camiguin and they tell me of a submerged cemetery. I think I’d go to that place some day and skin dive. I told them that as much as I’d like to go swimming with the butanding (whale shark) I might be gang raped by a school of butanding. Hahahah. On that night of the elections, we veered away from politics and discussed about some other deep stuff, like gay bars and ukay-ukay fashion. I particularly enjoyed the refreshing drink we had in Lemon Grass Restaurant.

Highlight of the meeting: I learned the Cebuano word for fingering: “Kulkog.”


Ahhhh…..high school…. A time lovingly glanced back by most people. The only thing I am thankful for my years in high school is the friends I made. For the first time in YEARS, I met with Larry and Alivio in Cebu. I would see Larry in Manila. Alivio, I haven’t seen since 2004. The former is a professor and Palanca-winner at the Ateneo de Manila University, the latter is a city planner based in Singapore.

We had an entire afternoon of discussion. Alivio shared with us on how livable Philippine cities are (they’re not really livable). Larry fumed on the pope’s latest rant in Brazil (the largest Catholic nation on earth) about the colonizers not really forcing the natives into Catholicism, because the natives joined in their own accord because there was a spiritual void they yearn to fill…yeah, right, that and perhaps the occasional plunder, mass murder, and forced conversion, Catholicism is a peachy keen colonial tool. I discussed of Manobo weaving patterns that have abstract images. Oha….intellectual!!!! ahahahahah

Also, check out Larry’s shoe, this is the only time my screaming orange sneakers were outshone! hahahaha

Highlight of the meeting: Finding out that a classmate who was once scrawny and bug-eyed is now a hot flight attendant you would want to be members of the mile high club with. Also, a batch mate is said to be working as a ROOM ATTENDANT in a hotel…. Oh the horrors for our school who touts itself to be the breeding ground of Cebu’s future political and business leaders. To think our batch is said to be one of the best batches in history…. They say from the volume of intelligent students, I would like to add that we had the most number of suicides and a most interesting suicide attempt, too. A classmate, who is one of the smartest and quiet in the batch, decided to do a Virginia Woolf and walk to the sea to drown himself. Yet, unlike Woolf, He forgot to stuff his pockets with rocks to weigh him down. He was saved and now nobody knows where he is.


I had dinner with Biba and with his cousin Bobby in a tucked away Spanish restaurant in Cebu. These two are best friends and are gay and fabulous!!!!

For hours, with a great plate of paella, I rambled on about the horoscope. I practically laid before me Bobby’s personality and character and he was amazed on how accurate I was. I told him that when we were made to decide to hire a person and we are whittled down to two or three candidates with equal standing, the final decision on who to pick was their zodiac sign and how that person’s sign was to jive with the office collective and strategic signs. When asked if I am a believer of astrology, I said not really but it makes you think that astrology is older than a lot of the world’s major religions. So there. Aahahah. Biba shared his experience as a judge for “Munting Bakla” (Little Faggot) beauty contest. Oh lordy. He said that the contestants’ ages ranged from 8 to 15!?!?!? Those little boys were subjected to child abuse as they sauntered onstage in campy and costumes to the hoots and jeers of the crowd. Biba was disturbed by the event and was never a judge again. The conversation then proceeded to barrio beauty contests. One of my favorite stories I heard from them was when this girl who was touted to win the crown only landed in first runner up. What that girl’s make-up artist did was to jump onstage and snatch the crown from the head of the winner and ran away! Ahahahah. What a great movie scene that would make!

Highlight of the night: I am so enthralled by the Cebuano language’s depth and variation. I learned that cemetery is not just “sementaryo” but the Cebuan word for that is Sam-Ang. But this is my favorite, so far, the uterus when translated to Filipino can be “matres” but in Cebuano it is “Tagu-Angkan” (the first word means hide, the second one means clan)….fascinating. I can only learn of these things from divas, bitches.


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