Posted by: nastypen | March 16, 2007

NO REGRETS WHATSOEVER and One Fantastic Birthday Bitch

I received some text, instant messenger, and email messages congratulating me of my new job. I heard some snide remarks that I regret leaving my high-paying job.

Obviously with my blog entry, some people do not read between the lines. Let me just say that I CHOOSE LIFE that is why I resigned. I don’t want to be enslaved by a clock at a daily basis. i want to have my life back. No amount of money, benefits will make me want to return to that passive-aggressive form of slavery. At least, not for quite a while.


Regrets are for the weak-willed and afraid. I am neither of those.

I think that is clear enough don’t you think?


Happy birthday to my little sister and the highest level of fag hag, Dang.

25?!?!? You’re 25??!?!?! Was it only yesterday that I had knee-high socks and you looked like this?:

I love the pinkness!!!!

Dang was sooooo cute. (She’s lovely now) She was the heaviest infant born in this generation in our family. She looked like a China doll. My sister adored her. I found it weird that I was upstaged by this siopao with eyes! I must have subconsciously envied her for those pink jumpers.

Was it only yesterday I tried pushing you off the ship? hahahaha. I swear to God, I almost killed my sister when she was 4. We were on a ship and she was leaning on the railings. I grabbed her and taunted her that I will drop her into the raging white waves of the Visayan sea. She just screamed once and looked at me with murder in her eyes. I backed out. I got deservedly slapped by my elder sister for that stupid act.

hahahahah. But of course we don’t hate each other. Please!!!! How can I hate this sister of mine when she gets depressed all she has to do is rearrange her trinkets and organize her clothes? You got to love an ultra systematic fag hag like Dang. She was so popular to all sectors in college. Guys find her pretty (I’m fabulous bitch! Pretty ka lang! Charing!), the ladies like her friendly nature and the faglings love her.

I love it that Dang is unafraid of glitter! My elder sister may have ran away screaming from that but here comes Dang with the more than usual sparkle in her eyes….well, on her eyelids. Her fashion sense is not boring and sophisticated, it’s colorful, blinding, fun and catches attention without even trying.

Back in her high school days, she looked like a well-fed Mexican girl. She is the most mestiza among us and her hair is so thick wind cannot blow it away. hahahahaha. She used to write poetry. We were pleasantly surprised that she was a wordsmith. But she was more adept to foreign languages. She taught me what is “WHATEVER” in French and “Bitch” in Arabic.

Dang also had a hard time in her life. At such a young age, she saw our father die on the hospital bed. She has had a series of disappointments. She is smart yet bypassed. But look at her now.

She’s happy. She has a great guy. She is unabashedly a great fan of the escapist Korean soaps. She got an Aquarium!!!! Harrumph!!!!! I envy her for that! Well, she can take care of the fishies, I hope she gets to name one in honor of her big brother…Dang, I want a fish to be named “Bette!” As in!!!

Dang is the only memeber in this family who works for the private sector, while all of us are slaves to the government jobs.

Of course, I’m just enumerating her shallow stuff about my little sister. A blog entry will never be able to fully articulate my gratitude and good fortune to have sisters like these. Dang is one of the best person I know. She has a kind heart. She is interesting to live with. She can relate well to a lot of people. Kids find her to be a joy. Adults are mystified by her control of the conversation and panache. Her beautiful eyes are mistaken for being shallow and adrift, yet I know Dang can be as cunning as an assassin. Her convoersations are always peppered by smiles and laughter, even when some stuff depress her.

I’m glad she’s my sister, I don’t expect anything less than the best.



  1. Is happiness equated with money? Then why is it that there are Indians that are still in pursuit of Nirvana? Or how about Christians who believe that there is more to this life? Why then is sex something that transcends biology and has been linguistically defined in the Bible as something that brings the best example of unity and closeness with the invisible God? I really feel bad that people don’t know their priorities, or that they think that money is the end all be all. Then how come in the past three weeks, I have seen people who have regretted not spending more time with their fathers who are still alive, or of mothers who miss their kids just being at home? I’ve never read an obituary that read something like “spent more time in the office”.

    Also I’ve learned that having more money is no guarantee that a person would get by or do well. In fact, I’ve seen the opposite. As incomes rise, so do expenses and lifestyles. Whenever I think that I am experiencing great difficulty in life, I remind myself that there are more people out there who haven’t even taken their first flight to another island in our country, much less get a decent education to finish college.

    I admit that I also aspire for a house of my own, a retreat house in the province and a big bank account of which I have nothing to show of right now. But all I know is this — my life is meant more than the pursuit of these things. These are just tools that are suppose to be shared with the ones that we love. But when the object of our affections change to the point that we lose our true callings in life [in my case, I believe that life is meant to be lived for God and living out those christian virtues] then we fail in recognizing who we truly are.

    I’ve heard from someone that I’ve never been the popular one in college. But that doesn’t bother me at all. I’m just that there are people like Nasty Pen out there who sees beyond the surface level, and sees a gem in a friendship that I even am surprised has blossomed and has risen from the shadows of time.

    So I end this with the phrase from the song of U2 that “love ……. is all that you can[t] leave behind…. so walk on.

    Walk on, my friend. Remember what happened to Lot’s wife in the Bible? She looked back at was turned to a pillar of salt. Now isn’t the time to look back and regret. Now is the time to just run and walk on in life…….

  2. napakapalad ng sister mo to have a “sister” like you ateng. happy birthday sa kanya.

    hello blas, parang separate blog entry ang comments! chos! hahahahah

  3. Dear Dang,

    I miss you a lot. I know you’ll have a job that will make you happy and make you want to hop to work. Just be patient. Great things are bound to happen to a person with a heart as pure as yours.

    Of course, it doesn’t hurt that you are smart without effort and look like you could be a movie star. Hehehe.

    Cheerio and never lose that smile ever. If anyone messes with you, I shall curse them with eternal athlete’s foot or worse.

  4. Uy Blas, I love salt. Hehehe.

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