Posted by: nastypen | December 21, 2006

Schadenfreude of the Year!

I was feeling all stressed and tired when I was informed of the ultimate story for my schadenfreude therapy.

This happened during a recent graduation of an affluent school (No, I don’t work there). The process was when your college is called, the graduates stand up and go to stage and get their diploma.

One pretty student had to go to the bathroom…big time. She was tensely looking about seeking a way to the bathroom. You cannot stand up if your turn is not up yet. If she stood up, she risks being hauled off by disciplinary officers. So, the stupid girl sat…and she shat.

So when it was finally her turn to stand up, the poop just conveniently fell from up her skirt and toga into the ground. She was reoprted to have been wearing a pair of thongs hence the accessibility of the shit to the outside world.

Read this aloud as if you’re a coñotic colegiala “she did it daw on her seat. when she got up it fell on the floor. kaya natapakan ng ibang tao when they stood up to get her diploma. they sprayed glade immediately daw sa area.” I got this from an online thread discussing about this situation. (The girl pooped on her seat. When she got up it fell on the floor. So, other people steppedon it when they stood up to get the diploma. The sprayed aerosol immediately in the area.)

So her poop falls to the carpeted floor and gets trampled on by her classmates, because, honestly, you won’t expecting to step on some shit on your graduation day, right? And who would look down on the floor marching to get your diploma? So, the poop was smeared all over the place.

Oh Lord! I cannot breathe from laughing. Now, I don’t know the veracity of this story but I was screeching my laughter. I was thinking that poor girl did not want to call attention to herself by standing up and going to the bathroom and being berated. She’d rather shit all over the place and be made from the stuff of cruel urban legends?

Talk about leaving a mark.

I was laughing at the commentaries such as “Perhaps she was not pleased with the type of educational system of the school?”

and then there’s “hmm.. siguro reaction nila is magtakip ng ilong.. hahaha. kawawa naman.. i hope hindi mangyari yun sakin.. siguro madapa ok pa. kaya pa yun e.” (Perhaps their reaction was to cover their noses…hahaha. How pathetic! I hope this does not happen to me. If I trip, it’ll be ok. I can still save it!)

or how about “Hmmm… Oo nga, wala naman magagawa ang discipline officers if someone has to go…Pagmasakit ang tiyan GO na, walang sabi-sabi, at walang ibang taong makakapigil dapat sa kanya. (True, the discipline officers cannot do anything about it. If your tummy hurts,then just go! Don’t speak! Other people should not stop her!) Lesson: Don’t let anyone control your destiny. Hehehe”

and my absolute favorite “She graduated with ODOR!”

Well, 2006 is a horrid year for her, as my sister put it to be” alarmingly humbled.”

Hope 2007 will be better for her.

…..And for all of us.

Happy New Year!

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Responses

  1. maybe she’s a dog in her previous life. territorial??? hahahahaha! my god, at least i only puked my guts out in true diva style in the privacy of the company restroom. Talk about being immortalized as the girl who shit all over the graduation venue. I wonder what her yearbook would say? (rolls in laughter with the possibilities)

    loved the schadenfreude song from Avenue Q, btw. hugs and kisses, dahlin!

  2. this seems to be familiar.

    nostalgic…. LOL!


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