Posted by: nastypen | December 20, 2006

Glory of the ’80s! and One Hot Mess

I thank God everyday for certain small mercies that get me through the day such as this one.

I am so swamped today. I’m the designated OIC. I have comic strips to finish later tonight. I have deadlines to beat and bills to pay. I have to pack. I organized a little dinner with the boyfirends of my sisters and mine too. Onyx almost blinded me while I was playing catch with her. The secretary at work has no voice and that means I have to answer the f*cking phones. And there are some executives at work that are myopic and I am getting tired of this shit.

Thank God Jem and the Holograms saved the day.

This is my first taste of what is to be known as guilty pleasure. Growing up in the 80s builds character. I just want to be left alone in the all boys Catholic school. while I ABSOLUTELY love the typical boys cartoons like Thundercats (completed the sticker album and bought a Wiley Kit figurine because Rustan’s Cebu ran out of Snarf toys.) or Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtles, Ghostbusters, Silverhawks (I Love Melodia!) Transformers (Can’t wait for the movie!) , I was watching Jem and the Holograms alone in the living room hoping that nobody catches me. It was utterly fascinating to watch a girl group with blue or pink hair with orange eyeshadow in serpentina gowns with ruffles as big as a volkswagon (Hey, the 80s look are making a comeback) sing and at the same time have adventures.

Because of this cartoon, I learned the word “Misfit” from Jem’s rival “Evil girl band” The Misfits. I secretly rooted for the evil girl group’s lead singer Pizzas to kick Jem’s behind. Even at a young age, I rooted for the divas.

If you are gay and grew up in the 80s, it was a defining moment to have a meek girl twiddle her earlobe and whisper “SHOWTIME, SYNERGY!!!!!!!” and have her transform into a pop star. This predated Sailormoon (which I love. I have a calendar of her, too). Here’s a video appropriation of Jem sining to Le Tigre‘s catchy beat Deceptacon.

The pop trash of the 80s can do no wrong.

*******

I’m sorry, but I hate Beyonce Knowles like a venereal disease. She’s megalomania and egomania with thunder thighs. I was never a fan of Destiny’s Child.

I know that En Vogue is far superior than Destiny’s Child.

Beyonce cannot act to save her life. She does not sing, she yoddles. Beyonce is all too self-aware and that just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Her mom designs dresses that make hookers look like convent novices. Her dad is so sleazy and should (insert torture fanstasy here). I thought people who adore her are taste deficient giving in to the pop trash machinery when there are infinitely more talented singers out there.

And her songs irritate me to no end…until I saw this youtube clip.

This bitch is one hot mess.

Beyonce, you ash to this lotion.

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Responses

  1. I love the thundercats, syempre si cheetarah ang fave ko. Hahahahaha. Love sailormoon din grabeh. I didn’t get to watch too much of Jem but I can remember the “Showtime, Synergy!!!” bit. Fun times! I also love robot cartoons, specially daimos… “Richurdddd!!! Erickaaaahhh!!!”

  2. i was never really into the cartoons you mentioned. well mainly coz i wasn`t even conceived during the time they were famous. :b but my older sister usually blabs about them alot. i`ve watched a few episodes in adult swim in cartoon network. lol.

    you don`t mind me commenting here often, do you? 🙂


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