Posted by: nastypen | November 2, 2006

Sneaking in American movie houses

Ok, I went to a beautiful museum today. Posed as a student in California State University. Went to Rodeo drive. Ate the most fantastic cheeseburger known to man.

But I might write about it on a slow day. Hey, it’s past midnight in Los Angeles now. I want to sleep but I have to blog.

Watching movies in cinemas in America is expensive as you may know. Currently, it is US$10 to watch a film. US$10 (500 Pesos)?!?!?! I could buy seven pirated dvd’s for that amount!

But I really wanted to see Jackass 2! I don’t know if that will be shown in the Philippines. So my new friend and I went to this cinema somewhere in Long Beach, California. I bought potato chips from a convenient store. I was told it was not allowed to buy food outside. Patrons have to buy food in the cinema complex where a drink can cost up to US$3! So, my friend took my food, took off his sweater and rolled my food in his sweater and carried it nonchalantly inside. We had quite a while before the movie starts and so we snuck in other cinemas.

I caught the first quarter of Saw 3 and saw bits and pieces of The Prestige. The former was disgusting but I still love the first Saw movie. The latter was a hunk fest and I will watch it in full. Maybe I will sneak in again after I watch the Borat film soon.

Oh, man, Jackass…..I love Jackass 2. My friend and I along with two other people were the only ones who watched the movie in this large cinema. I put my feet up on the seats in front of me chucking about my potato chips and guffawing like crazy at the antics.

You’d think a diva like me would revile the antics of Jackass? Oh, no, my dears. I love the Jackass boys. they’re naughty enough for me. hahahaha.

Bam, you want me to kiss your ass cheek to make the pain go away?

Oh, Lord, I will not go into details of the crazy stunts in this latest installment. All I know is that I had a hard time watching the movie because I was almost always throwing back my head in laughter of wriggling in my seat shaking, sniggering, and trying not to upchuck.

I remember watching the first time I saw Jackass in MTV. It was Steve-O wearing nothing except stapled pieces of paper on his butt cheeks. I was so drawn to the seeming irrationality of the acts. It helps that Johnny Knoxville is cute as hell.  He wears Chucks, too.  So, love him!
I watched the first Jackass film at the dead of night because I could not sleep and my sister said she won’t watch such garbage. So, it was a solo flight. I woke up neighbors with my laughter. that is how I love the barely clothed boys in their various abandoned states. This is not really slapstick humor.

I see sick people

This is “how far or low will you go to generate laughter” type of humor. The boyish charm….yes charm…. of these dudes add to the hype. I mean these are not teeth-deficient rednecks. These are skater boys who have peter pan complex.

As the New York Magazine article found out about homos pining for these jack asses:

For gays who grew up pining for the toned skater crowd, Jackass’s boyishness-run-amok is compelling. “These guys are every guy I wanted to bone in high school but couldn’t,” says Alfredo Lopez.

How true. It was an irreverent film, Jackass 2. Even the film director John Waters made a cameo. Waters is known for his nasty films involving dog feces and rectal dynamics in the 70s. He even had Knoxville star in his latest film Lowdown Dirty Shame, about people with voracious sexual appetites versus prudes. I loved that film, too.

Waters noted the cultural significane of Jackass in contemporary times as a reaction to reality television glut stranglehold over its viewers, the desire for instant gratification and the quest for pushing the envelope.

Whatever, I think Chris Pontius is hot.

Amen, baby, amen.



  1. yeah, “party boy” is hot.

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